I Sing Because...

 Hey guys.  I know I haven't posted in quite some time.  It's not because I haven't had anything to say.  I have a lot to say, it's just all jumbled around in my brain and I can't always find the right way to say the things I want to say.  I do not always want everything to come across as a pity-party, or like I'm looking for sympathy, so sometimes I write and then I delete.  But it still helps because I get to put all those thoughts into words, and that helps me.

Life is broken.  I know some of you "get" that more than others. You understand what that feels like and have lived it more than others.  We have all experienced our own brokenness in our own way.  Nobody's brokenness is more or less than the next person's because it is our own and we cannot judge what the next person is going through.  I recently lost a very close, dear friend of mind from church. We used to have coffee dates; we played Words and chatted online.  My heart is broken, I miss her.  One of Morgan's very close friends from childhood and high school (who we've stayed close with) was recently pregnant and she lost her sweet baby boy.  Ugh.  My heart was ripped.  Life is broken.  There is another situation that I cannot talk about in detail here, but BAM, there it was and hit me like a ton of bricks and took my breath away.  Sometimes, it just seems like life strikes you, just one blow after another. Relentless.

I got in the car yesterday and I was driving down the road and before I realized it, I was singing along with the radio, "Go tell the world about me. I was dead but now I live. I've gotta go now for a little while, but goodbye is not end."  The Commission, by Cain.  One of my favorite songs.  It goes on to say, "Don't forget the things I taught you.  I've conquered death and I hold the keys!"  Woo-Hoo and again I say AMEN!!!  "Where I go you will go too, someday, but there's much to do before you leave."

It just reminded me that I sing because... He gives me life, and purpose, and joy and hope!

I sing because, although I am in the middle of this storm, or that storm.... or maybe I'm not in the middle of a storm at all, He is still sovereign.  He still conquered death and the victory is mine.

I have no idea if this helped anyone, but when I started singing in my car yesterday, in the midst of all my pain, sorrow and down-heartedness, it sure did remind me that I can still RAISE A HALLELUJAH, IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STORM!!